I read a letter from a husband to his wife the other day that just blew me away. It’s so encouraging to me to know that even after 33 years together a man can still love his wife this much.
This man inspires me to appreciate others and perhaps most importantly to give selflessly. I encourage you to read his story below and to think of those in your own life who may be under appreciated. May God Bless you Always!
Never Recognized
I think we all know someone whose life thrives off doing for others, serving others, loving others, and caring for others. These people are a jewel. They are a breed that a selfish person struggles to understand and it is because of this type of person that we can breathe a breath of hope as our lives are made easier merely because these people exist.
I once read somewhere that the only way to understand a person like this is to be fortunate enough to be in love with one of them, and I am proud to say that I am one of those fortunate few. The person I have described to you is my best friend, my soul mate, but perhaps best of all she is also my wife of now 33 years. Truly, she is one of the many unrecognized persons I have referred to thus far and my purpose of this letter is to change that by telling you all about her.
I was nearing the end of my teenage years and getting ready to pursue the world by moving out and starting a career when one day my sister came in with a new friend. I remembering looking up from the TV to see who she had with her when my eyes met her big beautiful blues and it was at that very moment that my heart stopped and I fell deeply in love with her. She smiled at me and, in a moment that felt like ages, all I could do was look at her and smile back. It was during those very moments I just knew she was the one for me and after a little time and a good bit of work she became my wife. The love that engulfed our first meeting has strengthened by leaps and bounds over the years. Now 33 years, two kids, 2 Son in-laws, and a grandchild later I still get chills when she enters a room. The woman I am lucky enough to spend my life with is a person who would help anyone that needed it. She gives only of herself and does so without the need for personal gain. Her strength is immeasurable and her heart is larger than life.
It wasn’t long after we were married that her father, who had health problems already, started to get to a point where he could no longer work. He was a retired Air Force veteran and had been working full time in the police department for a good many of years. He was a hard working, respected man who was now being forced into another retirement due to increasing health problems. The realization of losing him was sinking in, and the burden of maintaining their household finances were being put on her mother. Her mother, at the time, was also working but was now being forced to quit so she could stay home and take care of him and the household responsibilities. She was scared and unequipped to do so and my wife, at that moment, quickly stepped in and took over. In no time, she had his retirement in force and the finances in place for the hospital care that her father was going to need. She spent countless hours doing everything from keeping the extended family informed on his condition to keeping the bills paid and the house in order while still maintain ours. She was available every moment until the end and even after. She worked hard and tirelessly and made her Father proud to call her his. She gave all of herself and never expected anything in return. During that season in our lives, I knew I had something special in a wife and this was only the beginning.
After her father’s death she took on the responsibility of taking care of her mother. We invited her into our home and she spent every day for the next fifteen years proving how dedicated she was to the needs of others. While having a full time job, being a full time wife, and becoming a full time mother of two she also took care of her mother’s needs which only increased over time. Her mother’s health too began to fail and I witnessed the same strength that impressed me so many years ago resurface. She prepared countless doses of medication, organized and attended many doctor’s visits and hospital stays while never faltering as a mother and wife. In fact, when our kids were young we took them on vacation every year and she organized that too. She never gave too little in any one area of her life. This was made evident with how involved she was in our children’s lives. She would go to their schools to read to their classrooms, attend field trips, and even became president of the ROTC booster club all because she loved her Children more than herself and knew they would appreciate it. She was unstoppable and impressive in her plight to be so. Fifteen years after the passing of her father her Mother too passed away, but not without knowing, respecting, and being in awe of the incredible woman her daughter had become.
I have, for over 33 years, witnessed my wife do all of these things without once stopping to ask, “What is in this for me,” and now the time has come that her poor body too is suffering. She is no longer able to do those things for others because of her own medical problems that have been progressing for a very long time. Every day I watch her struggle just to be with me and our kids even though I know there are times where all she wants to do is go to sleep and not wake up because the pain is so intense. She has spent her whole life being a strong woman and now she fights to even get up most days. I know in my heart that even though her physical body is hurting the woman I have witnessed take on so much over the years is still very much alive and fighting within her. It pains me to my core see her this way.
I asked her one day “If you could go back and change your life what would you do differently” and her response was immediate. She said that she would take care of her body better and love me a whole lot more. Even through all of this, she feels like she didn’t give enough of herself or didn’t do enough to prevent her failing body. It is because of this that I have realized what I would have done differently. If I could go back and do it all over again, I would have spent every waking moment telling her how amazing she is, how in love with her I am, and how thankful I am that she walked in my house and smiled at me all those years ago. She is my soul mate, best friend, and best of all, my wife, and now it’s my turn to take care of her and try to give back just a glimpse of what she has given me. I know the challenge I face and I welcome it with open arms because my love for her is bigger than any obstacle this world has to offer.
My plea to you is if there is anyone in your life like this, stop for a minute, hug them, and tell them how much you appreciate them for what they do. Tell them how unbelievable their passion for others is and that you know without a doubt that if it weren’t for people like them this world wouldn’t be one worth living in. You’d be surprised at their humbleness and will be encouraged by their strife. I thank God for these angels that walk and serve among us, and I praise him for allowing one of them to be my wife!
To my wife of 33 years with all my love,
Your adoring husband forever and beyond
